Why I Hate Taking The Train – You Know Who You Are!

February 17, 2011 at 6:22 pm | Posted in Fun | 3 Comments
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Recently I have been rather busy with work (no Mancry isn’t my full time job sadly)  and having to take the train regularly. 3 hours there and 3 hours back. It doesn’t matter if I sit in 1st class ( laptops everywhere with people in suits) or standard  class (next to the drug addicts and common scum), I always see the same type of annoying people that drive me absolutely fucking crazy. Here’s a list of the common offenders and you know the ones I mean. Hell you probably are ONE of them:

The Phone Guy

Fuck me. We all hate this one. It’s 6:10 am and phone guy calls his boss and says in the loudest voice possible:

” Morning Am I disturbing you? Oh sorry, yeah yeah just on the train. I have a few questions / I’ve been looking over the presentation…”

Well for starters, don’t fucking act like it’s perfectly normal to call your boss at 6:10am. Second, stop fucking shouting! We don’t care what you are talking about and I can promise you, you’re boss doesn’t give a flying fuck either. As soon as you put the phone down, we can all hear your boss saying “What a twat!”

On one of my recent travels, a guy next to me unfolded a large scale schematic on the table, on the fucking TRAIN, to call his boss at 6:10 to discuss the placement of the staircase on diagram B! You can bet his boss thought ” Twat”  at the end of that phone conversation!

The New Presentation Guy

This drives me fucking insane. Presentation guy is bored. He’s already browsed youtube and facebook and now he is getting desperate. File, New, Blank presentation. That’s it. The remainder of the journey is the same  fucking screen. Just adjusting the font size, few lines followed by a “urhh” noise, only to close the presentation WITHOUT saving it, to then open a new one minutes later. If you are bored, do what everyone else does and google “girls” and then browse the small thumbnail preview pics for porn! (wait, I’m the only one who does that!?)

The Loud Typer

Again, drives me fucking INSANE! Especially the woman with fake nails. Tap, tap , tap for 3 hours! I want to slap her and say press the keys like a human and not a fucking monkey! I’ll buy you gloves if it helps but please stop tapping!

The “Everything Apple” Guy

I hate him. On a train 99% of all computers are ugly boring Lenovo laptops. Company pays for them so we don’t care. They get the job done. However ,there is always one person on the train with an Apple product. And I mean Apple. Apple laptop, phone, ipad and ipod touch all out at the same time just to piss us off. Suddenly this guy not only has the biggest cock on the train but the nicest looking. You take a secret little glance at the ipad. You realize he sees you. He fucking loves it and smiles back. Bastard

Phone Looses Signal Guy

We are on a train, it’s fucking moving at 150 mph! So why do you act like someone just fucking died when you loose your phone signal!? Excessive outbursts of “Urghhh” and “Fuck sake” are TOTALLY over the top! Don’t place a phone call on a moving train then you fucking idiot!

Internet Looses Signal Guy

Even Worse than phone looses signal guy. It’s a shitty signal on a moving train on a fucking slow connection at best. Suddenly he realizes the Internet doesn’t work. He ask everyone on the train if they have the same problem ! When he confirms it’s down he then tells the whole train how there is no Internet. Then he acts like there is no air to breath.  Wait 30 min and try again! Not every 2 minutes you complete cock!

Well that was just a few of my pet hates! Didn’t even bother with the loud music players, low battery  guy! You know the ones! So next time you see them, ask for their e-mail address. E-mail them this article and see if they get the picture. Happy traveling!

P.s. I actually wrote this while on the train. Loud Cough guy is on here.. AHHHH!!

The Expendables 2 : What We Know So Far

February 14, 2011 at 12:07 pm | Posted in News | 1 Comment
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Possible Cast? Fuck Hogan..

 

 

If the latest rumours are correct, Expendables 2 may be set to commence shooting this year, and could feature an appearance from Jean-Claude Van Damme…

With the box office success of The Expendables last year, it’s inevitable that Sylvester Stallone would want to get a sequel underway as soon as possible. According to Bruce Willis, Expendables 2 could begin filming sooner than we’d expected. Collared as he left the Golden Globes on Sunday, the actor said, “Apparently it’s going to happen this year.”

When asked whether he’s going to reprise his brief but memorable role as Mr. Church from the first film, he said, “As far as I know, barring any unforeseen circumstances, but yeah, I would love to be a part of it.”

There are also rumours, meanwhile, that Jean-Claude Van Damme may be set to appear in the sequel, having turned down the chance to appear in the first Expendables movie. This is according to the website Van Damme Fans (which comes to us via Dark Horizons), where filmmaker Sheldon Lettich (who wrote and directed the Van Damme movies AWOL and Double Impact) suggests that the Muscles from Brussels could be set to sign up, but only if “Steven Seagal is not in the sequel”.

Legend has it that Van Damme and Seagal almost came to blows at a party held by Stallone at his Miami home in 1997. There was apparently a disagreement over which actor could “kick the other’s ass”. In a 2008 interview, Stallone told the magazine FHM that, when Van Damme offered Seagal a bout of combat in the back garden, the latter “made his excuses and left”.

How much weight we can put on Van Damme’s Expendables 2 appearance isn’t yet clear, but given the success of the first film, we’d be surprised if Van Damme turned down a second opportunity of appearing alongside Stallone and his action contemporaries.

(source Dean of Geek)

Let’s be honest – The Expendables 2 trailer could literally state ” No Story Line. No Plot. Just Action.” Come to think of it, that might even happy. We wouldn’t give a fuck, we’d see it anyway. I know what you’ll all thinking, there was a storyline in the first film?

Roll on The Expendables 2! Most important of all, Who would you like to see star in the film? Chuck Norris anyone….

Get typing below….

 

ManCry Helps The World Remember Cpt Phil Harris….

February 14, 2011 at 9:48 am | Posted in Articles | Leave a comment
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Well, If you haven’t seen my RIP Phil Harris page it is here. Since posting this lovely little scene, It currently has over 17,000 hits! With my e-mail box regularly notifying me of all your lovely comments – I think the Harris family would be truly touched.

Keep the great comments coming and be sure to check out the video. Don’t know who Cpt Phil Harris is? Then shame on you!

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