ManCry Debate Of The Week – Would You Fire The Ugly Girl At Work ?

August 31, 2010 at 3:24 pm | Posted in Film | 1 Comment
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This is why everyone should own a shotgun

Well, it’s been a while since we’ve upset people while making others laugh. So we’ve done midgets, wheelchair usersthe blind and tourettes, here comes our new topic. Let the debate begin :

Would You Fire The Ugly Girl At Work?


Well gentlemen, this debate has been around for years and I am sure it won’t be going away anytime soon. Just like our previous debates, the subjects suffers from some kind of hardship or disability. This still applies for the ugly girl at work. Come on, you KNOW who I’m talking about. I don’t mean the ever so slightly unattractive or plump lady you see in the office. I mean the girl at the work place that is so ugly, you double  take and think “Has there been an escape from the local zoo!?” or “Who the FUCK let that in the office and WHAT is it!” The funny thing is, or lucky in some ways I guess, is that the girl we are talking about, is usually completely unaware of her disability. Yes, we are talking flirtatious walking. Yes we are talking revealing clothing. Everything the really fuckable girl in the office does, the ugly one sadly also copies.Badly.  It send shivers across the workplace. But as we all know, most companies have codes of conduct in the workplace. This means on a bad day, you can’t just stroll up to the ugly and say “Shut your mouth you fat pig. I’m sorry everyone’s thinking it, I just said it.” You could do this but of course you would lose your job. You’d high five everyone on the way out of the office but you would still lose your job.

Now here comes the part that not everyone one admits. At some point it’s happened to you. Be honest IT HAS and you enjoyed it. At some occasion “the ugly” will make some kind of degrading comment to wait for the response of “don’t be silly you look great!” – This is when you can not say something and be offensive all at the same time. A Perfect example :

Employee “You coming  to the Christmas Party tonight!?”

Ugly ” You must be joking! Not with my face!”¨

Employee “OK” (walks off)

Small victories gents, small victories! Enjoy these moments please , they are great but sadly few and far between.  Now to the other side of the coin, a difficult subject. The deliberate bend over. Ew. You know the one I mean. Where you are minding your own business and the ugly drops something. The following site of her bending over and then delivering a cheeky smile, can only be politely described as  “The dooms day sunset.” And that’s just the arse end. The face roughly resembles a scene from “Lord of the Rings” to match. The event has actually been known to kill the weak hearted. You know what I mean.Even worse than this tragic turn of events is the following. Picture the scene :

You’ve almost finished the day at work. You’ve been busy talking and organizing a final detail before you are about to go home. As you finish a conversation and walk away, in the corner of your eye you notice something. While continuing to walk to your desk, you notice a unfamilar new woman bending over and it gets your attention. You enjoy the view for a split second and think “mmm nice arse” then seconds later you see her stand up and realize it IS THE UGLY GIRL. Oh my god what the FUCK just happened!? One moment of distraction , a “brainfart moment” and  you officially became aroused by the ugly girls body! You can’t go back in time. It happened. But what the fuck do you do!? You do what any man would. You call in sick the next day while you watch extreme doses of high definition porn to wash away the events of the day before. It is the ONLY way! Ever wondered why “Dave” called in sick? He seemed fine yesterday didn’t he? But he returns back to work after one day off sick looking even more tired than when he wasn’t ill!? He caught a view of the ugly and then took action like a man.Good job.

To finally answer the question – would you sack her? The answer is No. It’s a two part No because 1: You don’t actually know what the fuck it is that the ugly woman does around the office. It must be good, as she still works in the office. 2. It really really, REALLY makes you appreciate the Fuckable woman at work and your OWN life. Think about it, after a really bad day in the office, always think to yourself “Hey I could be worse off.Like Ugly. God yeah. That’s cheered me right up!Poor woman”

Then on the way out of the office one day just stop the ugly , tap on on the shoulder twice in a comforting manner and say ” Well done. You give me strength. See you tomorrow.”

Enjoy the day gents! If I’ve upset anyone, hey it’s not about YOU and if it is, you’ll never prove it 🙂

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New Sharing Options – Updated & Live Now – Help The World Have A ManCry!

August 24, 2010 at 6:40 pm | Posted in News | Leave a comment
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Our Mancry technicians hard at work.

Now thanks to wordpress, at the bottom of every post there are even more share options. Now it’s as simple as just clicking which button you would like to use (facebook, twitter, digg it, e-mail etc). So you officially have no excuses left not  to share your favourite mancry material. Unless that is, you’re too fucking lazy to press the button ? Fatty?

Get sharing, Kevin Costner’s Field of Dreams Ending Scene – the more exposure, the better. It’s what Kev would want.

I Cried Watching An Episode Of “Deadliest Catch” -Cpt Phil Harris Passes Away

August 15, 2010 at 1:06 pm | Posted in Articles | 4 Comments
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RIP

Yes, you read the headline correctly. I cried my eyes out. I’m a fan of the show and it is usually very entertaining. However, seeing the sad fate of Captain Phil Harris made me cry my eyes out. It was as beautiful and moving as a movie. Sadly it was 100% real. The hospital scene made me cry my eyes out again and again. What a lovely man and it’s nice to know he has thousands of fans across the world. You can download the episodes in full from eztv.it, Season 6 episodes 14 & 15. Moving scenes below, as well as his memorial. RIP Phil. I broke down in tears again when they released the full pot and the seagull flew off…..

The Expendables (2010) – A Proper Fucking Action Film For Men!

August 13, 2010 at 4:36 pm | Posted in Articles, Fun | 2 Comments
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Sly "Tell me again why you didn't like this movie!!!"

Well Gents, I can’t put this any other way than – WHAT A FUCKING FILM! I know it’s had it’s bad reviews already but hey those people simply don’t like action films. I was completely blown away by this film. With cheesy one liners throughout and more blood and violence than a mexican street rape, I don’t think anyone left the cinema without a smile on their face. Stallone hit the nail on the head with this movie. Just imagine all the men over the world going to see this film. Now you will be one of those men, who informs your friend “Dude, you have to see this movie!

I’m fairly confident that  in many years to come, kids will be studying this film instead of Shakespeare. Just stop and think for a moment here. Stallone , as of writing this post, it 65 years old. I’ll say that again – sixty-five fucking years old! Fuck me! I’m worried that I have to use a wheelchair or  piss myself uncontrollably when I’m 65 and Sly is running around killing people, punching people and being a badass! In the future there will probably be statues of Stallone in every city park with the motto “Sly can do it, so can you”.  Before countries go to war, they will watch the final scene from The Expendables. The first born male child of every family in America will be named Sly. Thousands of families will sit by the television every evening at 7 pm, to see “Sly’s wise words” (A montage of clips and sayings from all his greatest films.) When people die, at their funeral, the soundtrack will always be “eye of the tiger” at every service. You get the point.

If he keeps going at the rate he is now, he will be set for The Expendables 5 by the time he is 75! Seriously, what an amazing achievement to star in this film at 65, let alone write and direct it. Yes, his face looks like he has been through 2 world wars, but look at him – he’s ripped as hell and in amazing shape for his age. (god bless steroids)

You need to see this film in the cinema because it puts money in Sly’s pocket and he deserves it – simple as that. Just think about this concept for one moment. The film does very well. It does so well , that Sly announces a year later that they will make another one. Jean Claude Van Damme anyone!? Steven Seagal!? Chuck Norris!? The potential for a second film already gets me hard excited. The bottom line is – This is an action film for men. If you’re a man go and see it. If you don’t, you might as well spit in Sly’s face. Then spit in ever mans face that loves a good action movie. God I’ve actually sat through Twilight (not my choice)  in the cinema and was bored shitless, watching pale vampires leaping through the forrest. Finally a proper fucking action film FOR MEN! Oh and if you like Twilight and I’ve offend you? Get the fuck off my website, you’re not welcome here. We love Sly and we love this film!

(loads shotgun) Now who’s up for The Expendables II!

You WISH you looked even close to this

New Tweet Button Feature – Help The World Cry!

August 13, 2010 at 7:41 am | Posted in News | Leave a comment
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It’s now even easier to share your favourite ManCry content with The World! Now at the bottom of each post, you’ll see a tweet button. Just click this to share the link e.g. “Field of Dreams Ending Scene” to help others cry their eyes out. The number next to the button shows how many times it has been tweeted. I must admit, until now I thought the person who invented “twittering” was a “twat”, but now it’s quite useful 🙂  So feel free to share the posts you like here .

(all of them obviously!?)

(if you can’t see the twitter button at the bottom, it’s because you haven’t clicked on the actual post)

For anyone that didn’t know, you can follow us on twitter at www.twitter.com/mancry01

Inception (2010) – Mind Blowing Stuff!

August 12, 2010 at 10:46 am | Posted in Articles, Film, Soundtrack | 1 Comment
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I’m never been amazing with words, so I’ll just say this the simplest way I can : Fuck me, you have to see this film! Amazing, mind-blowing, original and breathtaking would be just a few ways I can begin to describe it. Not much of an explanation needed, the trailer says it all as always. Best of all, this film has at least 2 ManCry moments to enjoy. I would spoil it but they involve a father & son  and a Dad wanting to see his children theme. I literally cried held back tears in the cinema. I even found myself doing the manly cough of distraction and It’s been a while since I’ve done that in a cinema!

By far the one of the best parts about the film is the ending. You could hear the whole cinema talking about it and I didn’t stop talking about in the car on the way home. So please do me a favour, go see this film in the cinema, because the effects are well worth the money alone and I really want to hear all your feedback. Did you get “emotional” and what do you think of the ending? This should be an interesting discussion!

Go book the tickets NOW!

ManCry Movie Quote :

Eames: [Shows up while Arthur is in a gunfight] “You mustn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.”
[Pulls out a grenade launcher]

ManCry Star rating ********** 10/10

P.s. Awesome soundtrack to the film as well.

Everybody’s Fine (2009) – A Good ManCry!!!!

August 9, 2010 at 11:47 am | Posted in News, Soundtrack | Leave a comment
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The trailer says it all. However what it fails to tell you is this: You will break down and cry for a good 20 minutes towards the end of the film. A really nice heart warming film, with little twists and surprises that were so well placed, I didn’t see them coming, and you can’t fight a ManCry when you don’t even see it coming! I’m still smiling while I write this, so I might have to even see the film again. Great performances from all the cast. If you fancy a good ManCry (and who doesn’t?) then be sure to check it out. Love to hear your feedback!

ManCry Movie quote “Frank Goode: [showing photos of his children to a stranger] A million feet of wire to get them where they are today.”

ManCry Star Rating ******** 8/10

“The Expendables” Is Almost Here! INSTANT CLASSIC ALERT!

August 4, 2010 at 11:04 am | Posted in Fun, News | 3 Comments
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Sly "Just kidding lol. But seriously I could!"

Greatest movie cast ever.Period

**UPDATED** 13th Aug – Click here for The Expendables review

Well Gents, we can’t be crying all the time. So you should go and see this film. Its released this month and literally, will be an instant classic (not verified). With a cast of all your favourite action stars of the 80’s/90’s – it’s bound to be a success. Just add some explosions, guns and women and it’s gonna be great. Hell, from what I can tell about the trailer, there appears to be hints of an actual “Storyline” and occasional  scenes of  attempted “dialogue“. Does that mean Stallone even wrote, dare I say “a script” for this movie!? Brilliant! So go and be a big kid and be sure to check out this one. You won’t be disappointed.  Now let’s get down to an important question. Who would win in a real fight out of all these dudes ?

(Stallone, obviously, as he would always keep getting back up and saying ” That ain’t so bad” & “I didn’t hear no bell!”

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