ManCry’s Top 5 Fishing Excuses

April 2, 2010 at 6:56 pm | Posted in Articles, Fun | Leave a comment

Always a last resort....

I literally just got back from a fishing trip with a friend. In the space of 6 hours we caught nothing but managed to make about 1000 excuses to why we went home empty handed. So I thought I would share our top 5 excuses with you, use at your own risk, laugh along or be honest and just admit you have used them too!

Number 5 – Over-fished

A classic excuse. Just summarize with “This is a great spot. It’s too great – It’s clearly been over fished. There’s nothing here. Lets go home.” Short but sweet.

Number 4 – Under-fished

The opposite of the classic “Over fished”. Just explain your empty fishing net with ” This lake’s been way under fished. The fish have clearly migrated.” If ever challenged to explain “What do you mean  migrated? You mean the fish moved lake?”, just play it cool and answer with “Yeah, nature always finds a way.”

Number 3 – Perfect Weather

It’s as simple as this – How many times have you gone fishing on a perfect day and come home empty handed? Exactly. That’s because the weather is clearly too perfect. Too sunny, too warm or too quiet for the fish. Take your pick and stick to it. After all it’s probably true.

Number 2 – The Beer Can “pffhhhh”

This is a desperate one but it works a treat, especially with new first time fisherman friends. Play it cool, enjoy the day and talk to your friend normally while fishing. When he goes to open a beer from the bag, the very instant the beer is opened and goes “pfhhhh” shout out “Ah for fuck sake!I had one right next to the bait!” If challenged with “Where I don’t see it!?” reply with “Well of course not, you just scared it off!”

Number 1 – Global Warming

The best excuse but ironically the most seldom used. My friend used it today and I found myself driving home convinced he was 110% right. It goes something like this “Well you know the problem today right? Global warming isn’t it! Yep, we don’t even know what’s going on with the world’s weather right now, so how can we expect the fish to? We had such a harsh winter, everything was frozen worse than ever before. This causes the roots and plant life to rot and de-oxygenate. It wouldn’t surprise me if all the fish in here are dead. We’ll try again next year.No more we can do.”

So there you have it gents. The top 5 list in print. Be honest, how many have you actually used ? How many will you use? I thought so…..


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